2023 TOP 9
2023 had a lot of great music, which made choosing my top 9 albums for the year much, much harder. If I'm being honest, I’ve been experiencing a bout of imposter syndrome regarding writing about anything that isn’t for work. It felt almost like a disrespect to try and honor these works with words that weren’t 100% perfect or groundbreaking or particularly funny or interesting. But if for no one but me, I still wanted to uphold this little tradition I’ve created for myself anyways.
Because I had a wildly incredible year–an acoustic boygenius set of never-performed, brand new songs at fingerprints records in Long Beach; the Era’s Tour (in the third row!!) in Cincinnati; LCD Soundsystem in Columbus; MUNA two nights in a row at the Greek Theatre in Los Angeles; a show at the legendary Troubadour. I am lucky to have experienced all of this–and largely in the company of no one but strangers.
I’ve always been pretty independent which allows me to do what I want, but it doesn’t come without crippling anxiety which leads to over-thinking instead of being present. My therapist said I need to work on recognizing sensations instead of thoughts–and these few moments of bliss, whether at a show or when a song or a sound clocked me right between the eyes, are amongst some of the times where I feel closest to achieving this.
So without further ado, some of songs and albums that uprooted my world in more ways than one in 2023:
Utopia by Liza Anne
A treat to listen to from start to finish, every song on Liza Anne’s third album “Utopian” showcases their ability to work through the stressful ups and downs of growth and self discovery with not only grace and empathy but strength and humor. There are valuable lessons to be learned on songs like “Treat Me” and “Listen” and “Sentimental”; sleight straightforwardness on tracks like “Rainbow Sweater” and “Internet Depression”; and an over the top breakup banger from “Shania Twain Is Making Me Cry.”
I was fortunate enough to see Liza as a supporting act for Pussy Riot in Chicago earlier this year where I learned this album was written throughout the process of coming out as both non-binary and queer, really amazing context to have as a newly out person. Seeing some of these tracks live, and getting to talk with Liza after their set was really special (and Pussy Riot?? I was speechless).
“Sentimental” touched me in a way that few songs do from the first line: “Signs in the window say closed for the season.” Triggering my nostalgia sensors, it felt like someone was singing a lifetime of sensation back to me. For me it’s hard to get past what I’m thinking to experience what I’m feeling–and it feels like I’ve missed out on a lot because I was so worried about others and even just myself thought about me. So I needed to hear: “Just because you lost a lot of could-haves, doesn’t mean that you lost you. I get a little sentimental, guess that’s just something I do.”
I really love this shameless earnestness. I’m tired of pretending like I don’t love everything and everyone. I long to be a being of light! I wish, and on occasion feel, there is good in every being! And that we’re all just learning who we are day by day, moment by moment! This is what it feels like listening to Utopian–and for 35 minutes, I think it’ll make you believe it too.
Favorite Track(s): Shania Twain Is Making Me Cry, Sentimental, Out of Nowhere
I’d Be Lying If I Said I Didn’t Care by Hannah Georgas
I listened to this album probably about a dozen times just to make sure I was getting the full and proper effect to write this. There’s so much to take in, from the sounds to the raw and relatable lyricism, I can see why Hannah has worked with the likes of the National and Sara Bareilles. This is her fourth self-produced album and with each listen I hear something new, more relatable (“I feel really cool when I’m listening to Joy Division”), and some other way to weave Georgas’ own experiences with my own.
"Not The Name You Say" was the first track I’d heard and the sort of organ sounds at the beginning really scratched my brain in all the right places. Upon further listen’s, all the sounds, the buzzing, the time signature were really doing it for me. A few more listens, and finally I am hearing what Georgas has to tell me. The title sounds a bit self-deprecatory and throughout she goes back and forth–I don’t fit in, I’m not the one you want and I’m glad about that, but I also don’t necessarily know where I belong elsewhere. Much like a lot of my own internal dialogue, this effort to force someone (or yourself) into a box doesn’t go very far. But as Georgas titters a few tracks later–this too shall pass.
Favorite Track(s): Better Somehow, Not The Name You Say
the record by boygenius
What a year it was for the boys. As I was lucky enough to see them not once, not twice, but an absolutely over the top three times this year, I can confidently say that these three together create something special that mesmerized crowds across the world.
At a time when so many queer and trans folks are being persecuted (the latter murdered in America by the hundreds in 2023) boygenius has been unabashedly open about their radical acceptance of not just other queer folks, but anyone who’s been outcast, marginalized, or otherwise faced intense struggle. They’re revered by Joan Baez, Dave Grohl, even Barack Obama put “Not Strong Enough” on his annual 2023 summer playlist. They’re nominated for 6 Grammys, including some of the Academy’s biggest awards.
Despite all this grand attention, which has skyrocketed astronomically in the last year of the bands existence, Julien Baker, Phoebe Bridgers, and Lucy Dacus remain silly yet steadfast in their devotion to causes bigger than themselves. They continue to foster spaces for young, diverse groups of people to gather, all through beautifully crafted songs inspired by a keen understanding of the power of love, friendship, and connection.
the record did all this and more: it makes you laugh, it makes you cry, it makes you sing, it makes you re-evaluate how you can be a better friend, partner, and person. And singing these songs in unison with thousands of other people, in this space the boys created, is about as close to Stonewall as we’re gonna get in 2023 (i.e. thousands of teenagers screaming “kill the bourgeoisie”).
Favorite track: Not Strong Enough (my most streamed song in 2023)
Snow Angel by Renee Rapp
We are so lucky to collectively witness the advent of Reneé Rapp: actress, musician, Broadway caliber performer, bisexual icon! At just 23, Miss Rapp has starred in several Broadway shows, an HBO series, and co-written and produced an astonishing EP and debut album. Rapp has mastered every medium of her art, and to see her embrace what is likely to be her best project yet (herself!) is very exciting.
Throughout Snow Angel, we hear Rapp’s excellence both as a vocalist and a songwriter willing to put it all out there without, for lack of a better term, giving a fuck. From cursing an entire bloodline on “Tummy Hurts,” to “Poison Poison”, where Rapp’s uninhibited god-tier lyrical ranting comes to a head:
You're the worst bitch on the Earth I hate you and your guts I think you should shut the fuck up and die You get on my nerves Fuck you, you dumb bitch Fuck you, fuck you, fuck you
I’m sorry, what is more iconic than that? Another performance I was really bummed to miss–thank you TikTok for the never ending fomo.
Favorite Track(s): Talk Too Much, So What Now?
In The End It Always Does by the Japanese House
This was a standout album for me in terms of new music. I hadn’t really listened to the Japanese House prior to this year and it’s not what I usually gravitate towards (think more synthy, electric style indie pop), but there was a lot I loved about this album, including a gorgeous MUNA feature. I was disappointed I couldn’t muster the 22 year old stamina I once had to haul my ass to Detroit to see “One for for sorrow, two for Joni Jones” live earlier this month, but perhaps one day.
What struck me most about the “In The End It Always Does” is its very prescient vulnerability–like how the title is foretelling but also incredibly vague. In the end it always does? Does what? To whom?? It may seemingly just be Amber Mary Bain sharing the woes of post breakup struggles and mundane days spent ruminating in solidarity. But Bain’s voice and accompanying production creates an upswing that keeps your ears perked and hopes high.
Favorite track(s): Touching Yourself, Sunshine Baby, One for for sorrow, two for Joni Jones
The Rise and Fall of a Midwest Princess by Chappell Roan
If you haven’t listened to this yet, I must insist you go right away! Find your nearest pair of earbuds and get ready for 49 minutes of homoerotic campy pop bliss! The Rise and Fall of a Midwest Princess is an album you can’t listen to without smiling, or at least smirking as you wonder “what the fuck?” because regardless you still love it.
From start to finish on Midwest Princess, Chappell Roan (formally Kayleigh Rose Amstutz) keeps you on the edge of your seat, wanting more and consistently astonished by both her lyrical prowess and incredible vocals. As the title implies, we’re tuning into a hero’s journey, one that unfolds throughout 14 tracks filled with humor, heartbreak, love, and liberation.
It’s the plot twist that is “Pink Pony Club” however when I realize it’s not Chappell’s downfall we’ve been witnessing but her ascendence. Her detractors will see it as her fall but we, her beloved audience, and she, know better–this is her destiny.
Favorite Track(s): My Kink Is Karma, Guilty Pleasure
Yard by Slow Pulp
Who’s top albums of 2023 WASN’T this on? I heard Slow Pulp for the first time earlier this year (I am way behind considering they formed like a decade and a half ago) and it’s been a daily staple for me since. I can see them blowing up in a big way very soon. It’s not that they’ve reinvented the indie-folk wheel, they’re just doing it better than anyone else. Lead singer Emily Massey’s storytelling is poignant, self-aware, and straightforward, and a subtle twang paired with more traditional alt-rock culminates in a kind of new “timeless” sound.
Favorite Track(s): Yard, Broadview, Carina Phone 1000
Proof Of Life by Joy Oladokun
What a blessing to have seen Joy Oladokun perform some of the tracks off Proof of Life this summer right here in Columbus (with Jensen McRae supporting, can you believe!). So many tracks on this record gave me, maybe not full-throated hope, but a glimpse of it and a better perspective to consider. Joy’s writing, gentle demeanor, humor, and earnestness come together to create an album that not only tells you to keep going, but makes you want to.
Favorite Track(s): Changes, Somebody Like Me, The Hard Way
Lost In A Rush Of Emptiness by Bleach Lab
Some of my all-time favorite bummer songs, Lost In A Rush of Emptiness by Bleach Lab is the band's first album and project recorded all together in a shared space. From the cover to the lyrics to the general vibe, Lost is just that: 44 minutes of settling into the void. I relate to this sense of listlessness and could wax on all day about it–but Bleach Lab makes it sound a lot better and cooler.
Favorite Track(s): Counting Empties, Nothing Left To Lose
Honorable Mentions
My Soft Machine by Arlo Parks
Dollface by Hana Bryanne
Girl With Fish by Feeble Little Fish
Tracey Denim by Bar Italia
Sorry I Haven’t Called by Vagabon
Guts by Olivia Rodirgo
1989 (Taylor’s Version) by Taylor Swift
EPs
The Tree by Maren Morris
How (Vmp Edition) by Dead Gowns
The rest by boygenius
Mud On My Superstars by Keni Titus
DEMOS by Wyatt Davidick
We’re All Doomed by Shallow Alcove
Keeper by Good Terms
Rivals by Tommy LeFroy
God, I Hate This Place by Annie DiRusso
The Era’s Tour
Disclaimer: If you hate Taylor Swift, or dislike earenest declarations of admiration for Taylor Swift, I am afraid this is not for you!
Just wanted to get that out of the way!
It’d been nearly five years since Taylor Swift had played a live show and she had a lot of time and songs to cover. A prolific songwriter, Taylor’s released three new albums and two re-records of previous albums since the Reputation tour in 2018. Just three weeks ago she released another re-record from her stolen catalogue: the entirely self-written Speak Now, 13 years after its original release.
And she made time to stop by little ole Cincinnati to grace our show with not two but THREE surprise songs. It was a good day, the BEST day, if you will.
Mackenzie and I were lucky enough to get third row tickets, the closest I have ever been and will probably ever be at a Taylor show. It even still feels unreal to me–such a strange sensation knowing that Taylor experiences it two to three times a week. I know I don’t know Taylor and I never will, but to be in that close proximity to someone who has provided me a sense of calm and a realm for escapism for so long was like...very healing for my inner child. To revere her in such a strong and passionate manner is unconventional, irrational even–but for one night I was allowed to feel that and feed it and free it.
This show is an incredible feat of production, costume and stage design, stamina, artistry, choreography. It’s so emotional to think about because it is essentially Taylor’s entire career wrapped up into a three hour performance. While no songs from her debut album are included in the base setlist, and just one from Speak Now is included (for now), she relives every stage of the last 18 years of her life in 5 to 20 minute periods. From the costumes to the sparkly guitars (personally bedazzled by T’s parents, Andrea and Scott) to the band members who have been with her since the first time I saw her in 2009, experiencing this show up close was truly magical.
When “You Don’t Own Me” by Lesley Gore starts playing, that’s when the countdown begins, and shortly after a huge timer appears on the screen, counting down at 2 minutes to go.
When the panic sets in.
“You don’t wanna fight me!”
As the song ends and the timer hits zero, a dreamy mashup of all Taylor’s greatest hits fills the stadium and finally Miss Swift rises up from the depths of the stage in all her glory and glitter, singing “Miss Americana and the Heartbreak Prince” in a bedazzled body suit, matching boots, and long blond hair free falling down her back. Suddenly she launches into timeless banger “Cruel Summer”, then takes a break to hype up the whole crowd for the bridge, as it is one for the ages. Suddenly the stands vibrate in proclamation:
I'M DRUNK IN THE BACK OF THE CAR AND I CRIED LIKE A BABY COMING HOME FROM THE BAR / SAID I'M FINE BUT IT WASN'T TRUE / I DON'T WANNA KEEP SECRETS JUST TO KEEP YOU / AND I SNUCK IN THROUGH THE GARDEN GATE EVERY NIGHT THAT SUMMER JUST TO SEAL MY FATE / AND I SCREAM FOR WHATEVER IT'S WORTH I LOVE YOU AINT THAT THE WORST THING YOU EVER HEARD
It is hard to believe it’s been four years since the summer this song came out–I’d make anyone who’d listen turn it on and watch with righteous indignation as they were forced to agree: this song fucks.
After introducing herself and welcoming all 65,000 of us to the ERA’S TOUR!!!!– we got a few more from Lover: ”The Man”, “You Need To Calm Down”, “Lover” and “The Archer.”
(Live photo creds to Mack! Paul pictured here has been with Tay since the Fearless era and is a Cleveland, OH native!!)
Then, lo and behold, Miss Swift and her band made their way right in front of me and Mackenzie, skipping happily into the Fearless era with the title track (I am literally crying thinking about it), followed by two more timeless Taylor tunes including “You Belong With Me” and “Love Story.”
Too soon we are whisked into the evermore forest–witchy capes and faux floating orbs included. The beginning guitar riff of “‘tis the damn season” plays as Tayor makes her way back onstage wearing a golden gown subtly embellished with crystals and lined with soft but regal ruffles–fit for a kind but powerful queen. Then “willow” is playing as Taylor conducts a crowd of cloaked dancers and their floating eyeballs–I didn’t know what was going on, Taylor later desribed it as 'sorcery.' Regardless, it was mesmerizing.
Taylor played ALLLL the evermore heavy hitters–”marjorie,” ”champagne problems,” and “tolerate it.” And if you were lucky enough to be at Cincinnati night 2, another very important track. More on that later.
Although reputation the album isn’t necessarily in my top Taylor albums (as of right now, it is ever changing!), I think it is one of her most important periods both personally and artistically, therefore is one of my favorite eras. It is easy for me to empathize with Taylor, a straight-passing, cisgender, white woman–but I can't imagine anyone would react well to millions of people telling them to disappear. For her to have felt the need to completely disappear–to contemplate the possibility of no longer making music, what she was very clearly ushered into this lifetime to do.
If you listen to what Taylor has to say, you'll learn the lengths to which she will mold herself to make others comfortable, happy, satisfied. She admitted to toeing the line on a lot of sensitive topics to placate a broader audience, but she is slowly abandoning that strategy.
Of course people still proclaim proud declarations of hating Taylor Swift, dismissing her talent, undermining her intelligence (and even more so that of her fans). While often Swiftie's aggressive and defensive nature can be chalked up to an unhealthy parasocial relationship with Taylor, I am here to tell you my goal when dealing with Taylor haters is to drown out that hate with love (and 'have you ever listened to 'Death By A Thousand Cuts'?).
For her to come back–and come back fiercer and stronger and healthier: that is what reputation was all about. It was joyful to relive its high points: the array of dancers dressed up as historically accurate versions of Taylor trapped in boxes, screaming 1-2-3 let’s go bitch (entire stadium including Tay’s cast participating) at the beginning of “Delicate”, worshiping at the heels of the worlds greatest pop star during “Don’t Blame Me.”
Reputation really did allow Taylor to shed her skin, just like a snake. Much to the chagrin of her haters, what was intended to be an insult grew into a beautifully relevant metaphor for rebirth.
Rats, on the other hand, just eat garbage and carry disease.
Next we got a very brief foray into Speak Now Taylor serenading us with “Enchanted” as she strolled the stage in a dazzling pink gown, sparkles included and reminiscent of Cinderella. Perhaps a harkening back to Easter eggs for Speak Now dropped in the Midnights era “Bejeweled” video.
Another wild picture from Mackenzie’s round up
Before I knew it Taylor was sauntering down the stage in a replica of her infamous outfit from the “22” music video. She skips down the stage to one lucky fan whom she greets by name then hands off her (signed) hat. At our show, Ally was picked, a four time cancer survivor and lifetime Taylor fan who’s first concert was a Taylor show. YES I AM CRYING AND SO ARE YOU JUST ADMIT IT!!!
Taylor then played all the RED era classics–”We Are Never Ever Getting Back Together,” “I Knew You Were Trouble,” and the entirety of the ten minute version of “All Too Well.”
I had earplugs in for most of the show–but during the second verse of ATW I popped them out because I knew this was a moment I wanted to experience in all its glory. While I can’t say that RED was ever a Taylor period I was deeply invested in in the moment (more on this in my reflection on RED (Taylor’s Version)), it is hard to deny the impact and influence of a person who has hundreds of thousands of people every weekend singing every word to a ten minute and 13 second song. Even the security guard standing in front of me sang along to every word.
For this song to at once be a pain point for Taylor to perform, the original version being nearly 6 minutes shorter, to now being a ten minute period of camaraderie and catharsis for not only her but her hundreds of thousands of fans; to live through that and experience it in real time with others who truly, genuinely appreciate it (not to mention my lifelong best friend!!!) inevitably replaces painful memories with a beautiful remembering of being completely present in that moment.
As we’re transported to the folklore cabin, Taylor appears atop the roof to reminisce about what could have been during “the 1.” She climbs down to join her band, starting on the first of the folklore love triangle tracks. We were a mere, I don’t know, 50 feet from Taylor and her band as we screamed together “would you tell me to go FUCK myself?? Or lead me to the garden??”
"The Last Great American Dynasty" has always made me emotional as Taylor loves to say it’s ‘not biographical’–but the parallels are so distinct. If you don’t know this song please go listen to it first–it chronicles the life of Rebekah Harkness who previously lived in the Rhode Island beach house Taylor now owns.
Successful on her own as an American composer, socialite, sculptor, dancer, and philanthropist, Rebekah married into massive Standard Oil wealth. She was shamed for her lifestyle, blamed for her husband's death, and detested by the locals. Fifty years later a certain someone bought the house– and would memorialize the so-called ‘maddest woman the town had ever seen’ in a song that’d be listened to and loved by millions. Or loved and listened to millions of times by me, in the least.
Then before I could even begin to gather my emotional bearings this bitch starts in on “August” and it was as if my soul ascended from the stadium. Ethereally floating across the stage, green dress billowing, we collectively reminisced: ‘Back when we were still changing for the better / wanting was enough / For me it was enough, to live for the hope of it all.’
Taylor sang a quick interlude of “Illicit Affairs” before the haunting coos that dot the beginning of “My Tears Ricochet” filled the stadium. Another painful but powerful anthem, it felt personal to sing this with Taylor–to echo her words back to her as an affirmation that what happened was tragic, a deep and traumatic loss. She’s got a grip on her narrative though–this is not one that people can misconstrue: her work was stolen, everyone deserves to own their work without compromise, and she is reclaiming it.
All too suddenly Taylor is on stage in a sparkly, orange two-piece number and matching booties and we are ass shaking to “Style” which is absolutely an ass-shaking song if you know how. 1989 is one of T’s most popular albums and her first project with pop-savant Jack Antonoff. The expected hits are all played– “Blank Space”, “Shake It Off”, and “Wildest Dreams” and “Bad Blood.”
Then it was surprise song o’clock and the air was thick with anticipation. It was hard to contain my excitement as we all waited for Taylor to announce what extra track we’d be hearing her sing that night. But wait–she was wondering, would we mind, if maybe she played a song she’d never played before? Mackenzie and I looked at each other, racking our brains of what it could possibly be. The internet had told us it was absolutely to be “Right Where You Left Me”, the first bonus track off evermore–but wait. Taylor was asking–she’s been collaborating with someone quite a lot lately and they’re a Cincinnati native. Would we at all mind if she brought them out to play it with her? Out comes Aaron Dessner looking as mousy and cute as ever–and I couldn’t help but exclaim aloud “I have never been more happy to see a straight white man in my life!!!” It was true!
As they hugged and we all tried to keep our composure, Taylor made her way back to the mike and exclaimed “Okay so we’re going to play “Ivy”” and the entire crowd went absolutely FERAL. I giggle when I think about it because she absolutely knew what she was doing–dropping the title and barging right into the song, giving us no time to recover and before I know it we're all screaming "CLOVER BLOOMS IN THE FIELD / SPRING BREAKS LOOSE THE TIME NEAR IS NEAR / WHAT WE HE DO IF HE FOUND US OUT???"
It is a gift only Taylor can give–and Cincinnati Night 2 was chosen to hear the first live performance of one of the greatest and gayest Taylor bridges of all time. It was so beautifully arranged–just Tay strumming the main chords while Aaron effortlessly carried the melody on another guitar, bobbing his head along, occasionally mouthing the lyrics and looking over at Taylor with gentle admiration.
Aaron made his way off stage and Taylor asked everyone to give another round of applause for MUNA and wasn’t it a bummer that Gracie Abrams wasn’t able to play? "Would it be alright if we did three surprise songs tonight?" inducing deafening cheers, from yours truly included. Out pops Gracie from the middle of the stage to join Taylor at the end of the runway, taking a seat at the piano. Taylor says they’re going to play one of Gracie’s songs–”I miss you, I’m Sorry” and as the song ends Mackenzie is looking over at me, actively crying: “It must have been so cool, just like a crazy moment for her.”
As Gracie departs the stage,Taylor nestles her gorgeous koa wood guitar, ‘Taylor’ inscribed in mother of pearl along the neckline, against the piano and takes a seat. A song that needs no introduction, she began “Call It What You Want”, stoically tapping out the melody on the keys, but singing every word with purpose, remembering. I wish I could replay this part over and over and over–a thought that loomed the entirety of the night.
Finally, Taylor rises up on the stage in a purple sequin t-shirt and matching fluffy blue-bear looking coat. The beat of “Lavender Haze” fills every crevice of the stadium, while all around programmed wristbands pulse in a purple hue, lighting up every person for Taylor to see.
As the risen stage descends back down, she ditches the jacket and skips up to the main stage to begin the first verse of “Anti-Hero.” I remember when Midnights first came out last fall how fun it would be to be to scream “IT’S ME HI I'M THE PROBLEM IT’S ME!!!” with tens of thousands of other adoring Taylor fans–and it lived up to all my expectations (second only to singing it with Miss Marcella Jean who already knows the words!).
Mid-show there was some rain and so tents were put up over the band's equipment, partially obstructing the stage. During the first chorus of “Anti-Hero” Taylor made her way over to the right, popped her head past the tent to wave to everyone a little ways back. She did the same on the left side of the stage during the second chorus. She can’t see every single person–but she does her best to acknowledge everyone who came, a common theme I’ve noticed at every tour of hers I’ve attended.
Giant Taylor please step on me🙏
I really did my best to scroll past tour spoilers of things I wasn’t inherently aware of (I understood some songs were obviously to be included, re: “22”, “August”, “Lavender Haze”), so I was pleasantly surprised when “Midnight Rain” was included in its entirety. As the song ends, Taylor ducks underneath a tent of gigantic umbrellas, emerging in the “Vigilante Shit” bodysuit, garter and all.
Then came a song I was very much looking forward to, strictly for dancing purposes. “Bejeweled” is the perfect bouncy, happy, bitchy, you-don’t-know-what-you-have-til-its-gone anthem. Then the next Midnights track, and the second to last of the setlist, “Mastermind" begins.
Despite the fact that Taylor is the complete brain power behind her entire career as a musician and songwriter; despite the fact that she’s sold millions, if not BILLIONS, of albums, broken countless records, written over a dozen record-breaking albums; despite the tens of thousands of hours dedicated to her meeting and connecting with fans (always free of charge); despite all this–she cannot control what other people think. She cannot control what the public perceives of her. But what she can control, she will, and she will do it with the skill and ease of a well-trained assassin. A mastermind.
As Taylor gives the crowd her most gracious thank you’s, the intro of “Karma” starts, the most fun end to the most fun night. Going through an entire lifetime's worth of work–just to end the entire thing with a reflection on the timeless adage. You know, “Karma is my boyfriend, Karma is a god, Karma is the breeze in my hair on the weekend, Karma’s a relaxing thought, aren’t you envious that for you it’s not?”?
Bear with me for a bit longer: will we ever know the truth about the details of Taylor’s very sussed out and over-contemplated private life? No. Whatever the words mean to Taylor, they mean something to me, and to many other people. Music has this power to create a bubble of empathy–if only for a few minutes. Someone who knows every word to “Mr. Perfectly Fine” is likely a friend of mine, if only for four minutes and thirty-eight seconds.
The Era’s Tour is a chance to experience this sensation for three hours, and relive nine different albums and era’s of Taylor’s life. If you’ve been around as long as I have (and a lot of us have), that's also nine different eras of one's own life. It’s time capsules of songs to pass down to your kids, to your sisters’ kids, to the next generation of closeted queer kids, and songwriting junky lunatics; hidden messages to share when you can’t quite figure out the words yourself; the one thing that can calm a rapidly beating heart in a moment of panic.
If you made it through this entire thing, I applaud you. If you scrolled through for the visual aids, I hope you enjoyed them. If you made it through this entire thing and you’re not an active Taylor listener, I hope I have swayed you to give her a chance if only as a favor to ME! I think you’d be pleasantly surprised if you did.
Because being a Swiftie is the shit, and I'll go to my grave saying that.
Did you attend the Era’s tour? What were your surprise songs? What would be your dream surprise song duo for the Era’s Tour?
Leave a comment below.
2022 top 9
Here are, in somewhat particular order, my favorite albums released in 2022
Self Help by Future Teens
I found out about Future Teens from Hanif Abdurraqib, a Columbus native and award-winning writer slash all-around-cool-person. Since I was lucky enough to see them in Columbus in October (September? Time is a construct) at Big Room Bar, I got to hear a majority of the tracks on this album from a dreamy, front row view!!
Self-Help touches on a lot of tough themes including novice alcoholism, self-loathing, and seasoned heartbreak. The honest way they describe these experiences though offers solidarity and comfort, rather than the piercing shame that often trails self-deprecating thoughts. The details throughout their songs offer a personal, sometimes painful, portrayal of all the ways that life can turn what seem like hills into mountains in a matter of seconds, but with a most positive, self-affirming spin.
Becoming my own person is something I struggle with, but many of the songs on this album have given me a sense of relief knowing that there are others who have some of the same niche, not necessarily *good* habits I do (“I did nothing but skip another meal and walk around the Target” ??? I’ve never related to anything more).
There is a modesty in Future Teen lyrics, but I love when they go big:
“Feeling best when I feel nothing”
“When going pains this much we’ll make it a gift to be gone”
There’s just something about Future Teens music in general that’s really personal and approachable. Maybe it’s because I had a whole conversation with their lead singer Amy at the merch table without even knowing she was the lead singer. But it feels as if my closest friends were in a band, making a song journal inspired by my life. Lol. I love these songs, and if you’re looking for something honest, catchy, and comforting to listen to in the new year, make it Future Teens!!
My favorite tracks (I’m putting some not on this album too ur welcome):
“Well Enough” - One of my favorite songs this year (made a whole playlist based off it)
“Going Pains” - You’ll make it through the going I promise
“BYOB” - Bring your own bullshit!
“Smile with Your Teeth” - When you’re contemplating abandoning your entire way of life
“Guest Room” - For when you’re feeling behind on growing up
“Believe” - Cher cover, fucking amazing
“Swiped Out” - For when you’re over online dating because fuck online dating
Household Name by Momma
Household Name is Momma’s sophomore album and the lack of skips is truly astonishing, as there are none: every song is a windows down, year-round banger. “Medicine” was the first single off this album and right away I was drawn to the fun guitar riffs and grunge pop rock sounds. Something about this album is also oddly nostalgic and I can’t quite put my finger on what it is.
I got to see Momma open for Snail Mail when they were in Columbus a couple months ago–silly me didn’t even know until they got on stage and I was PUMPED. They’re lowkey performers and so is their music in a way, so it’s easy to bop your head along and pretend you’re just passenger seat vibing, cruising the coast somewhere. Or partake in light moshing if that’s your thing.
While we are all aware I love Taylor Swift, I’m kinda over Jack Antonoff pop and looking for similar content but different sounds. Momma solves this issue with brilliant and brash lyrics in deep, angry vocals set to loud, thrashing drums. Every song is really effortless–from the vocals to the guitar sounds to the almost too honest lyrics (can you tell I have a vulnerability problem), this record has certainly made Momma a household name in my home (har har).
Not a skip to be found, my favorites are:
“Speeding 72” - For head banging
“Brave” - For sad girl head banging
“Rip Off” - For pissed off rockstar head banging
“Tall Home” - For fun rockstar head banging
Pre-Pleasure by Julia Jacklin
There’s something ethereal about Julia Jacklin’s music. Between her voice, her lyricism, and the haunting sounds of the music itself, listening to Julia Jacklin is almost a transcendent experience. Almost like being in a different world, which is a really crazy thing for music to do. There are albums I associate with specific periods in my life, but it was as if Pre-Pleasure already had a definitive spot and had finally shown up to claim it.
So naturally when I saw she was performing at Brooklyn Steel while I’d be staying in Brooklyn I was floored. It was an incredible show–that day she had picked up a set of chimes from a music shop in Manhattan and it was quite literally magic to hear them live. The venue was packed and the vibes were immaculate. (Many thanks to my cousin Lucie for not only housing me for that weekend but accompanying me to the concert even though it wasn’t what she called “ass shaking music.” She’s a real one.)
This album is really powerful in a lot of ways. It’s a very candid portrayal of self-realization and accountability through the lens of getting older. It’s almost like a guide to understanding what you want out of life and relationships, with helpful guardrails to keep your past in the past but enough in the rearview to know you don’t want to go back there again.
So many incredible, candid, and beautiful songs on this album. Jacklin didn’t hold back when writing any of these songs and they are truly a joy to listen to, even if I am sobbing. Jacklin pulls you in for deeply important moments and feelings–and asks you to feel them for yourself if that means shedding a layer of pain in the process.
My favorite tracks:
Listen to the whole thing start to finish if you know what’s good for you.
AFTER DINNER WE TALK DREAMS by MICHELLE
I heard MICHELLE for the first time mid-pandemic and the sunshine filled electro-pop bop ‘SUNRISE’ made me an instant fan. I was thrilled to see them on the bill to open for Arlo Parks last January and so greatly anticipated their sophomore album. It ended up one of my favorites of the year!
Every track off ADWTD is increasingly addicting–groovy but sad, both upbeat and devastating. I relate to the internal battle of enjoying being alone but deeply caring what others may think of your aloneness. Sometimes it feels shameful to want to be alone–but when I hear “POSE”, and see my stupid fucking ghost tattoo striking one, the shame turns into gratitude for giving myself the choice to be happy with me.
My favorite tracks:
“POSE” - For dancing in your pjs
“MESS U MADE” - For when ur pissed
“MY FRIENDS” - For after dinner talking dreams
MUNA by MUNA
My relationship with MUNA started as something I once listened to passively and shifted into a means of realizing and accepting myself for who I am. So yes “Silk Chiffon” made me a little gay. Only kidding, sort of. But every experience with this song was arguably a peak–the first time I heard it, the first time I watched the video (inspired by the cult classic “But I’m A Cheerleader” starring icon Natasha Lyonne), and the first time I heard it live WITH Phoebe Bridgers–that may be the peak to top all peaks.
I’ve seen MUNA five times in the past year-ish. Every performance is increasingly better and some of the best shows I’ve ever attended–stress free, good vibes, safe crowds. It’s gay church. The outside world doesn’t have spaces like that. MUNA shows provide a place to be yourself and feel safe. I wish we lived in a world where everywhere was like a MUNA show!!!
This isn’t about the shows though, lol sorry back on track. This self-titled album is, and I can’t make this up, skip-free. MUNA is different though because every track on this album checks off a gay sad girl mood: joyous, horny, frustrated, anxious, sad, happy, free, confused, and lonely at the same time.
Every song is unique, both flawlessly written and produced. Like in terms of a well-made, thought out piece of work, this is it. It’s accessible in that there is something for everyone yet somehow personal to every person who listens to it. Whatever body you’re listening from, MUNA accepts you and loves you and understands you (unless you’re a homophobic, transphobic, racist, anti-semitic, xenophobic, capitalist asshole in which case, fuck off).
Their first two albums are incredibly good, don’t get me wrong. But I do think the switch from RCA or whatever Hollwood label they were on to Phoebe Bridgers’ Saddest Factory Records really gave them new life to write songs without the unbearable pressure of corporate executives breathing down their necks to put out more palatable content.
Because that's just not who MUNA is, making themselves more palatable is not their brand. Acceptance, love and celebrating queer joy is their brand–and it’s become quite clear in America and a lot of other places, these ideals in their purest form are not palatable for everyone. MUNA presents a world in which maybe it is, or it could be, and at the very least starts to chip away at the walls that keep us from that reality.
My favorite tracks:
“Anything But Me” - My #1 played song on Spotify this year, rightfully so
“Kind Of Girl” - For a good cry when the patriarchy got you down
“Silk Chiffon” - For instant sunshine and love
“Runners High” - For refining your taste–this is a masterpiece
Running with the Hurricane by Camp Cope
Another band I was lucky to both find and see live this year. I love Camp Cope’s sound–there’s something really different and appealing about how they use the bass line to lead the melody. It adds a new depth while allowing the guitar to play a more relaxed tune that makes everything sound a bit softer. They’re also Australian and just have the greatest, thick as fuck accent (think naurrr) and are really fun to see live.
Camp Cope understands me because they’re just like “Oh you think women are emotional? Better fuckin buckle up.” The lyrics are so honest it’s almost like they’ve just pulled a stream of consciousness directly out of their brain and into a song. RWTH is written and performed in such a way that you’re like ‘wow that was both a work of art and a banger.’ It’s beautiful, vulnerable, and gut-wrenching at times.
I love acoustic guitars as the base of songs, and many tracks on this album feature the perfect intro including ‘Jealous,’ ‘Blue,’ and ‘The Mountain.’ All offer a definitive resource on what someone earlier this year described to me as ‘yallternative,’ a term I can’t seem to stop using (to my own dismay). It’s just too perfect–it’s my new favorite genre.
Notable tracks:
“Blue” - For when you want to listen to “Blue” by Joni but can’t because Spotify refuses to take down Joe Rogan’s fucking podcast, this is a good substitute
“Jealous” - Needy Natalie loves this one
“Sing Your Heart Out” - Everything about this is perfect
New Warm Mountain I Believe in You by Big Thief
I put this one off purely because there are so many songs. And they’re all long and so filled-with-beautiful-tidings-of-sweet-pondside-sitting-on-a-lilypad-enjoying-watching-the-butterflies-pass, I’m unsure how to even begin talking about it.
I wouldn’t consider myself like one with nature in any sense but listening to this album in the dead of summer soaked in sweat walking to parable to get an iced flower power is like nature letting me in on the fun without having to go camping.
These songs give me a real sense of nostalgia–they’re easy to strum on the guitar and so many remind me of the songs I learned to play when I first picked up a guitar in sixth grade.
As I write this, it’s December 8 and outside the temperature resembles a chilly spring day, rain falling instead of snow. Albums these days have to transcend not only seasons but global warming and DNWMIBIY does it quite effortlessly. The guitars are carefree in August yet thoughtful in December; in August I’m carefree–in December I’m given no choice but to be thoughtful. I relate.
I also love the solid range of songs. “Change”, “Certainty”,“The Only Place” are earnest yet sweet; “Spud Infinity” and “Love Love Love” are excessive and fun and impossible to overlook; and “12,000 Lines” is probably one of the reasons why Big Thief made it into my top 5 artists on Spotify this year.
This isn’t necessarily an album I wanted to listen to all the time, but when it came on I couldn’t turn it off. Not to mention at least a few tracks made it onto every playlist I made in the latter half of this year. It’s long, there’s a lot of content to disperse, but all a beautiful reminder of how impactful music can be in its purest form.
My favorite tracks:
“Wake Me Up To Drive” - For a short bike home from a dreamy summer night out
“12,000 Lines” - A sweet and easy tune to strum
“Little Things” - Head banging with heart <3
“The Only Place” - Please play at my funeral
Superache by Conan Gray
A killer sophomore album for Conan Gray, whose 2019 Kid Crow pierced my heart in the sharpest and purest of ways. Conan’s albums have amazing range, welcoming you in with mellow, enchanting tones before going off on maddening but enchanting tales of unabashed, (usually) unrequited love. I get it <3
Superache and Kid Krow are phenomenal in different ways: KK is sentimental and frustrated and purposefully loud while Superache is angry and contemplative, yet light. Transcendent, unhinged! even. But still graceful.
Everything on Superache probably needed to be said–and there’s a lot of really devastating moments. Especially the phenomenal trio of “Footnote”, “Memories”, and “The Exit” near the end–“Footnote” and “The Exit” as two heartbreaking ballads about one-sided, disposable love bookending the struggle of letting go in “Memories.”
Conan, self-proclaimed to never have fallen in love, sure is good at writing about falling out of it. But I know this little angel baby songwriting king will figure it out one day and I can’t wait to hear all that he has to say about that, too.
“Movies” - When u want a love like the movies
“Jigsaw” - I would advise listening to “Checkmate” from KK and then “Jigsaw” for the ultimate listening experience
“The Exit” - If you’re a slow mover on like yours truly
Nervous at Night by Charlie Hickey
This one grew on me immensely–I didn’t truly didn’t realize how much I love it until I listened to it start to finish for the first time on my way home for Thanksgiving. Charlie is signed to Phoebe Bridgers label, and Nervous At Night is produced by one of Phoebe’s bandmates Marshall Vore; I hear her all over this record in the best way.
One of the many reasons I love this album so dearly. Charlie has a comforting and candid way of describing the nuances and growing up, how that intersects with the way we were raised, accompanied by sweet melodies and candid lyrics (‘You gotta be fucking kidding’ being one of my favorites).
I graduated almost four years ago, but I don’t feel at all like what I thought an adult would. I live on my own and make my own living and manage to keep the cats and several plants alive and this is a shock to me more than anyone else. Nervous at Night reminds me of times that once seemed so unbearable– and the realization that everything that feels similar now will eventually be trivial.
“Thirteen” - One of my favorite songs this year
“Mid-Air” - For reminiscing on old times while sipping on a cup of tea
“Nervous at Night” - For happy sad bopping
“Gold Line” - For god sakes!!
A bonus because I can’t count (I don’t have this on vinyl either so it worked out)!!
SOS by SZA
I was simply not cool enough to listen to Ctrl when it came out but you know the Phoebe feature got me listening and now I can’t stop!!
Every song on this album, even the devastating ones, exude an envy inducing confidence most (me) can only dream of. I personally have never experienced such a seamless and soul-crushing blend of vulnerability, confidence, and longing on one album (if you have please point me in that direction).
It’s the willingness to air out her own issues that lend a lot of the songs an accessible quality that I really enjoyed and appreciated. Many make me feel like I need absolutely nobody and nothing but myself (see “Conceited”, “Low”), but others that feel like they’ve been pulled directly from the deepest, most painful part of my subconscious: “Special” tears me apart inside but I still listen to it multiple times a day, “Nobody Gets Me” is not only cathartic as fuck to scream in the car but also relatable for the most basic of level of heartbreak, and “Ghost in the Machine” featuring Phoebe Bridgers is the sad girl collab of the year.
SOS is a beautiful blend of honest lyricism, unique song range, and cultural significance. Iconic if we’re being transparent.
My favorite tracks:
“Special” - Sad girl hour top listen
“F2F” - For when you’re ovulating and need rough sex
“Kill Bill” - For when you're contemplating killing your ex (do it)
Honorable Mentions !!!
Farm to Table Bartees Strange
Gemini Rights Steve Lacy
Midnights Taylor Swift
Harry’s House Harry Styles
Are You Happy Now? Jensen McRae
Pure Chaos Lou Roy
Wet Leg Wet Leg
DECIDE DJO
Salt Circle Eliza McClamb
Surrender Maggie Rogers
CLAIRO
Kemba Live - March 3, 2022
March 10, 2022
From the first day I heard Clairo over three years ago I have been waiting for the moment I could see her live. From “Amoeba” on the piano to the magnificent contributions of the wind section to Claire shedding a tear during “Blouse”, I was grateful to be in the crowd for this last minute addition to the sling tour.
Although we heard a sniffle or two, Claire plus her killer six-piece band played all the things with none of the frills. It was outstanding.
Her most recent work with Jack Antonoff on Sling prompted a shift in her overall style so the tracks she played from Immunity fell in similar fashion with the more classic sounds from Sling. I fell in love with Clairo because of Immunity, but the subtle shift from its original smooth and synthetic glide to Sling's more organic, traditional sounds was pleasantly seamless and very well done.
She started with a few tracks from Sling: “Bambi”, “Zinnias”, “Wade”. She followed these with two tracks from Immunity including “North” and a long-awaited, bucket list track for me, “Bags.”
I was especially moved that she played “Harbor” and “Impossible” back to back, as these are my respective sad girl songs on both Clairo LP’s. Then I heard a couple more bucket list tracks, including “Softly” (if you haven’t listened, this is a time capsule song for me) and “Blouse.”
Arlo Parks, who opened with a delightful set, reappeared to accompany Claire for “Blouse.” They sang sans band–Claire gently strumming and then sniffing back tears as the audience picked up the words when the infection kept her from singing. Arlo put an arm around Claire and as we all finished up the song together, she said “Sorry, that’s just never happened to me before.” There were a lot of amazing first’s for both of us that night.
Then we got to hear a remainder of Sling tracks, including “Just for Today”, “Little Changes” (incredible), “Patridge”, “Nomad” (new and unreleased I think), “Reaper”, and “Joanie.”
The piano riff from “Amoeba” began and that was another “Holy shit this is very surreal” moment.
I (clearly) was very taken aback by the impact of seeing Claire finally–someone I’d so deeply admired, and listened to on a daily basis, for three years! As I watched and listened, I marveled at how this show, happening then right in front of me, could hold several years worth of memories. How I listened over and over again to all of these songs desperately seeking camaraderie—and now re-living years worth of visceral memories in a matter of hours and a 20 song setlist.
The end of the set gave us a delicate rendition of “Management” followed by “Pretty Girl” which left “Sofia” for the closer, a sweet nod to Immunity.
For some (dumb) reason I thought the Sling tracks wouldn’t fare as well in a live setting as the Immunity ones, when they were all perfect in actuality. This is now my formal request for Clairo to record an Immunity long pond session.
Concerts make me think very existentially, because I like to think when I’m old and miserable I’ll have these moments to think back on. And I always think about what Clairo (or any artist of interest to me) will be to my niece–and will she just absolutely detest everything I love? Will she take to the mixtapes I am bound to make her?
If there is an album I do think Marcella should be listening to, it’s Sling. It holds a valuable lot of lessons for anyone coming of age and dealing with the very monumental realization that at some point you may have to care for someone other than yourself. It’s daunting. Sling makes it tolerable–something to look forward to, even.
The several year wait to see Clairo was ultimately worth it, and lucky enough for me, Clairo and crew are making their way back to Ohio in July. Hearing a song live quite impacts the way I hear it afterwards, so I look forward to the slew of new (hopefully less painful lol) memories I’ll have to relive during Cleveland’s set.
Until then, xx.
New year, new Saturday’s playlist!!!
2021 top 9
Here are, in no particular order, and for no other reason than image aesthetic, the top 9 albums I bought/received this year:
History Of A Feeling Madi Diaz
I could listen to this on repeat forever, I love it so much. The music itself is quite simple, but paired with Madi’s lyrics, every song becomes a perfect balance of anger, release and perspective. The simple production also creates a very intimate experience, something I’m especially grateful for during times like these.
My favorite track: “New Person, Old Place”
Head of Roses Flock of Dimes
I’ll be honest, a lot of these songs are lost on me lyrically but I enjoy listening to them regardless. “Two” is likely one of my favorite songs of all time–I get chills every time I listen to it. It’s such a simple concept: “Can I be one? Can we be two? Can I be for myself, still be still with you?” An inherent connection created by two completely independent entities, like of course, duh yes!
My favorite track: “Two”
Star Crossed Kacey Musgraves
Looking back I feel like this was released at a weird time, but art doesn’t wear a watch! Nevertheless, I do quite love this album. I love how it’s incredibly eclectic yet still somehow completely linear. Plus a VISUAL EXPERIENCE? I love that shit. More of that in 2022 please.
My favorite track: “easier said”
Comfort To Me Amyl and The Sniffers
If you don’t like loud, thrash your head around music, lighten up! This is so fun to listen to and a really great way to sonically let your frustrations out. I love hearing about frustrating female issues from an unabashedly loud and aggressive woman, versus the tame, prim and proper manner we usually have to take when airing our grievances. This is definitely one of the most badass albums of 2021.
My favorite track: “Knifey”
Valentine Snail Mail
I was super bummed when I found out this concert was postponed due to lead singer Lindsey Jordan needing to get POLYPS removed from her VOCAL CORDS. Isn't that crazy?! However, this means more time to listen and absorb. I’m noticing a lot of female rage and angst in the indie pop/rock faction and I am here for it. Like a lot of (really) good albums, Valentine takes a little while to grow on you but when it does, it’s a completely different experience.
My favorite track: “Headlock”
Collapsed In Sunbeams Arlo Parks
Arlo Parks is literally made up of sunshine and sunflowers and love and you cannot tell me otherwise. This album is one of the most beautiful things to ever exist and if you haven’t listened to it, I deeply envy the sheer love and warmth you’re about to experience for the first time.
My Favorite Track: “Too Good”
evermore Taylor Swift
Ok yes evermore was released in 2020 but it is consistently put on the back burner as some kind of folklore afterthought and that’s bullshit. (Personally, I think album ranking for any artist is an elitist waste of time, especially for someone with a catalogue like Taylor Swift.) I also really love evermore for the kind of pivotal shift it signaled for Taylor’s career—and I think often about where we’d be culturally in regards to Taylor Swift had it not been for the whole catalog sale monstrosity.
My favorite track*: “cowboy like me”
*The evermore bonus tracks are my favorite of Taylor bonus tracks by far, including vault tracks.
Sling Clairo
This was quite a departure from her first few releases, but one that beautifully suits Clairo as an artist. I love the way that this album feels mature in a very vulnerable way. Naivete or ignorance is so often looked at as a weakness, even though no human on this earth is exempt from it. This album is about growth and learning how to care for something other than yourself; it’s comforting to hear someone else’s struggles with figuring that out.
My favorite track: three way tie “Harbor”, “Management”, “Little Changes”
Notes from the Archive: Recording 2011-2016 Maggie Rogers
There’s nothing Maggie can put out that I won’t enjoy. I think she’s made a significant impact on the swift shift in interest from mainstream pop to indie pop, which I guess is a contradictory statement. But still, popularity doesn’t reduce or denote quality. Notes from the Archive does not have the same angelic level production masterpieces of Heard It In A Past Life. But the songs are warm, and they’re Maggie in a way we haven’t really experienced. I like to know what Maggie was doing in her past lives, you know?
Red (Taylor's Version) – a reflection
Reflection piece on Taylor Swifts re-release of her 2012 album RED.
November 15, 2021
My relationship with Taylor Swift was different when RED came out. This was when I began listening to alternative pop and rock, and I wasn’t necessarily in the headspace for a breakup album (more on that later). So naturally my love for Taylor Swift, a songwriter and storyteller whose work transcends generations, fell to the back burner. I was not yet wise enough to appreciate Taylor’s writing, let alone understand the significance of a track like “All Too Well” and what it would mean for someone my age, and generations to come.
I thought I was in love as a sophomore in high school. One time my boyfriend was over and I cried to him that I wasn’t at the RED tour; he said something along the lines of “If you’re going to cry about Taylor Swift instead of pay attention to me, I’ll leave” and I said “Okay bye.”
Of course, I called his bluff and he stuck around (because I’m a catch). Even when we inevitably broke up, RED wasn’t an album I turned to because I wasn’t sad, I was relieved. This wasn’t my breakup album, at least not at the time.
Taylor was in her early to mid-twenties when she wrote all of these songs; I’m approaching a quarter century this month and as I listened to RED (Taylor’s Version) this past week, I was overwhelmed. Had I ever listened to these lyrics? It felt like no, I hadn’t, even though in reality I had heard all these songs a million times. But sheesh experience really do be opening your eyes.
I stayed up until midnight to listen because I have done that for every album (I think even for RED when it originally came out, despite my nonchalance about my Swiftie status at the time). I was really looking forward to the vault tracks, and equally excited as I was terrified about the Phoebe feature. Taylor never does anything half-ass, and it is really powerful to watch her reclaim these songs in a way that honors the integrity of the original versions while still somehow making them better. This is a monstrous feat only someone with Taylor’s (well-earned) self-assuredness and talent can pull off.
“State of Grace (Taylor’s Version)” kicks off the album with the familiar and deep beat of a drum, like your heartbeat as your crush walks past. Taylor’s voice is so much stronger than it used to be. There’s a confidence in her voice that never could have existed under Scott Borchetta’s reign, and it’s really moving to watch how her growth as an artist and a person has allowed her to find her voice, and a way to reclaim her past.
“Red (Taylor’s Version)” entailed a maniacal dance party in my living room, jumping onto the ottoman and breathlessly shredding an air guitar (lol I have no shame) after screaming the bridge. “Treacherous” has always been one of my favorites because as a fellow Sagittarius I deeply resonate with that “you realize this is likely going to be BAD but you do it anyway” energy. “Treacherous (Taylor’s Version)” was equally as good, except this time you can hear the smirk in Taylor’s voice as she reflects back on all the ways that this attitude impacted her story.
“I Almost Do” is high on my list of Taylor songs, and Taylor’s Version is an exceptional rendition, ironically elevated all these years later by the soft twang of a mandolin. I like that with time comes Taylor’s ability to transcend, and even disregard, genre. When she originally released RED, there was such an enormous amount of pressure for her to pick a side: pop or country. Now Taylor has the confidence to execute a song on how she knows it will sound good without the confinement of the unspoken bounds of genre; these small changes signal a significant growth that make the re-recordings extra special.
Some other highlights are of course, FINALLY, “Better Man (Taylor’s Version)” and a fun rendition of “Babe (Taylor’s Version)”, both of which were at one point passed onto other country artists, to great success (Little Big Town/Tay won a Grammy for Best Country Duo/Group Performance for “Better Man”). HJ
Phoebe Bridgers has had exponential growth in the past year and a half, so her featuring on a vault track was bound to happen. That it so conveniently lined up with my deep Phoebe obsession is just proof that this album wasn’t meant for sixteen year old me, but current me. I anxiously approached “Nothing New (feat. Phoebe Bridgers) (Taylor’s Version) (From The Vault)”, desperately hoping Phoebe’s rising notoriety and popularity would warrant (finally) a full verse and chorus feature from a female singer on a Taylor track.
What we got was even dreamier than I imagined, like the stars aligned to make this collaboration happen. What’s so moving about this duo, for this song, is their symmetry: Taylor wrote this as she was reaching a level of stardom few seldom do, while Phoebe’s popularity currently skyrockets. Taylor and Phoebe are really only five years apart in age, but for some reason this song feels like it’s somehow indicative of the lack of progress we’ve actually made in the liberation of women; no matter what you look like, what kind of art you make, what your sexual orientation is, society will try to destroy you because we refuse to acknowledge the deep-seated misogyny that plagues LITERALLY this entire universe.
That being said, I am very glad Taylor finally allotted a full verse and chorus to a female feature, and extra glad that Phoebe was the first. Like a lot of people (particularly women who, prior to the last year, hated Taylor Swift), Taylor was dealing with some deeply internalized misogynistic tendencies. This song, and Phoebe’s full feature, is an acknowledgement of the way women's minds are warped by misogyny, Taylor’s included, and the shame that follows giving into this way of thinking.
I enjoyed all of the vault tracks, and I’m interested to see which ones grow on me the most. I found “I Bet You Think About Me (feat. Chris Stapleton) (Taylor’s Version) (From The Vault)” extremely charming, with Stapleton’s feature a welcome change from Justin Vernon. That we got an accompanying music video just days after release was the icing on top of a Taylor-clawed, RED velvet cake.
After all these days, we got the ten minute (and 13 second, duh) version of “All Too Well.” The original version, within five minutes and thirty-one seconds, paints a visceral portrayal of the vulnerability and rawness that comes with heartbreak, the deeply personal moments that come with being completely alone: paralyzed by loneliness and living through the desperate longing for a previous self that hadn’t been involuntarily, emotionally gutted.
Or something like that, idk.
The extended version and its accompanying short film are fraught with nostalgia, which is kind of revelatory considering nostalgia is usually associated with positive memories, not traumatic ones. Is there a term for nostalgia for a miserable yet thrilling time of your life? Insanity?
I think it’s pretty obvious that Taylor has all but solidified her status as one of, if not the greatest, songwriter of her generation (and possibly ever??). We didn’t need to hear the ten minute (and 13 second) version to know this. The current climate we live in says a lot more about this release than anything else.
I don’t know about anyone else, but I was slightly uncomfortable watching Sadie Sink (19 years old) and Dylan O’Brien (30 years old) interact the way they do in the short film. The actors were deliberately chosen because they’re nearly the same age as Swift and Gyllenhall when they dated. Now over a decade later, Gyllenhall gets older but Taylor is right, his lovers don’t: his current girlfriend is 25; he turns 41 this year.
There’s something to be said about how society allows this kind of weird grooming to happen, but also the way we react to it, which is usually turning a blind eye, or worse in Swift’s case. We blame her for the end of the relationship and call her a monster for preying on men to write songs about them.
Can we…maybe...talk about...the grown man emotionally preying on, and likely emotionally abusing, someone barely old enough to drink? Think about it: a man nearly ten years her senior; meaning ten more years worth of life experience, relationships and emotional development. And that’s without all the societal bullshit that comes with being a woman in her twenties, amplified a million fold because you’re the most famous female teen on the planet. Why do we denounce young women for being vulnerable but say nothing about the way older men prey on that vulnerability to their advantage?
Taylor turns 32 this year, about a year older than Gyllenhall when they broke up. There’s something full-circle about this, but knowing Taylor, not coincidental. Time has carried her past his invisible age threshold, straight to the emotional maturity and self-assuredness he wanted (expected) her to have. But with time also comes healing, and that’s what makes Red (Taylor’s Version) so beautiful. These 11 years have afforded Taylor the grace and wisdom to understand it’s not a bad thing to willingly and unabashedly give yourself to someone; that there’s nothing shameful in trusting someone you thought loved and valued you, and being hurt when they break that trust.
Like Swift, I’ve grown quite a bit since RED came out in 2012, and I still have a lot of growing to do. I am a firm believer in reincarnation and karma, and I love how these re-recordings act as a sort of reincarnation of Taylor’s past selves, here to guide us the way she wished someone would have guided her. Red (Taylor’s Version) came just when I needed it, and now it’s my version too.
Find RED (Taylor’s Version) featured on my latest creation: sad girl autumn 2021 (below)
Sylvan Esso
Express Live – November 3, 2021
November 5, 2021
I had been debating whether or not I wanted to see Sylvan Esso when they came to Columbus; they’ve been on my radar since 2014 when “Coffee” came out and I was just a wee sophomore in high school. Like most things that were cool and ultimately good for me, I ignored Sylvan Esso for more exciting, radical acts like Catfish and the Bottlemen and Weezer (yes, I loved Everything Will Be Alright In The End).
What’s funny is I’ve held Sylvan Esso on this very high pedestal of like, musical exceptionalism for a long time, despite knowing very little of their work. I know a lot of cool people who listen to their music and what’s included in my rotation is very good. Alas, where my inhibitions lie I don’t know, but the tickets were $30 so I bought one. Maybe it was the impulse, or the notoriety, but mostly for reasons I can’t name, I was more excited for this show than usual, and pre-concert butterflies swarmed my brain.
I don’t usually feel the need to comment on the crowd, but the cis, het, white men of Columbus really showed out in the 5-panel hats and condom beanies. Absolutely outstanding work, Indie brethren. According to Sylvan Esso, a “wild” amount of people showed up on a Wednesday; they must not know Ohioans will use literally any excuse to drink on a weekday.
Sylvan Esso comprises lead singer Amelia Meath and producer Nick Sanborn, and while the duo may look unlikely standing next to one another, there is something very natural about the way they interact on stage. Amelia is outspoken, an incredible singer with an outrageous range and stage presence. Nick is far more reserved, but still passionate and excitable at just the right moments. It’s a dynamic that provides a sense of completion, like everything in your universe, and theirs as well, came together so you could make it to this moment, this show. Music really do be beautiful like that sometimes.
Every moment was a highlight, from Amelia’s dancing (there was much of it) to the howling and the three song encore. The setlist was perfectly curated and laid out, easing the crowd in “What If” before launching into “Ferris Wheel” and following up with several additional bangers (for lack of a better term).
Then Amelia made her way up to a (symbolic) rooftop for dancing. Upon her return to the ground floor, she and Nick literally created the riff for “Hey Mami,” Amelia singing each key and then Nick somehow ensuring we heard it seconds later, seamlessly pieced together and a near perfect match to the record.
“Free” was equally noteworthy: Amelia stood stage right, watching her reflection in an oval shaped mirror as a beam of light bounced off and shone away from her, eventually making its way across the crowd. She did so very slowly, almost like she was making sure everyone got the opportunity to not only see themselves, but maybe see themselves how they see her? How free everyone would be if only we viewed ourselves the way our loved ones and true friends do! How liberating would that be if we gave ourselves the grace we give others, or the love and admiration we give celebrities we don’t even know. I’m glad she made me think about it, so anyone reading this has to think about it too.
Hearing “Coffee” live was incredibly cool, another nod to my bebe indie days (it came in at #56 on the Alt108 2014 countdown). They finished up with “Play It Right” before returning for a three song encore to my greatest joy. One is certainly appreciated but three is outrageously kind, so thank you Sylvan Esso.
As I am sure is evident by now, I am very glad I decided to attend this show. Some words I jotted down when I got home were “fantasmic,” “limitless” and “powerful.” Even finishing this up a few days later, they don’t sound over the top or silly to me. All shows are special (and a privilege!) but Sylvan Esso caught me off guard in more ways than one, quietly making an impact when I wasn’t looking. You know, the way things do that are cool and ultimately good for you?
Find Sylvan Esso featured on my latest creation sad girl autumn 2021 (below)
IDLES
Newport Music Hall, Columbus, Ohio
October 10, 2021
Despite lead singer Joe Talbot exclaiming that his voice sounded like “a bag of dicks”, IDLES delivered an absolutely iconic set full of unforgettable crowd dives and LOTS of spitting.
I don’t go to a lot of what would be considered hardcore rock concerts, so this was a new experience for me to say the least. The closest I've ever come to “moshing” was when I saw The 1975 in Pittsburgh when I was 16, and this was more involuntary as the 13 year-olds around me were so determined to get closer to Matty Healy they gave no fucks elbowing me in the side to get there.
I did not participate in the moshing at IDLES, but I was more than happy to spectate, and there was a lot to take in.
I was introduced to IDLES by an old co-worker, who upon my prompt for albums to listen to in order, said I should try Ultramono. I gave it a shot and was very taken aback by how much I liked a lot of the songs (despite not being able to understand a lot of the words, you need closed captioning for how thick their accents are). It was a quintessential quarantine album, a new and refreshing addition to my less than exciting daily routine.
So when I saw they were coming to Columbus I figured it may be a good change of pace from my usual suspects. I was expecting the show to be nutty, but it exceeded my expectations in every facet: moshing, crowd surfing, spitting. I was out of my comfort zone, but that’s what this whole concert-going experience is about, so I soaked in the discomfort and did my best not to get hit by flying objects (or people).
The crowd was singing so loud I was convinced that I had to be the only one who didn’t know the entire setlist. Everyone else made up for my shortcomings though, because my ears were ringing the entire time (and continued to do so for a few days after). Talbot’s voice, or lack thereof, was a non-issue, with the band doing a lot of the singing, and the crowd taking over every word when necessary.
During the first song, “Colossus” Talbot prompted the crowd to split in half (or rather he said “SPLIT THE FUCKING CROWD.”). Once they successfully parted the sea, everyone went absolutely fucking nuts and started thrashing into one another, and I finally found out what moshing was.
I really only knew a few songs, mostly from Ultramono. “Grounds” is a popular single that speaks to their anti-war, proletariat attitude and is a treat to hear live, raising my pink fist and screaming “Black is beautiful” with a couple hundred new friends.
Some other notable (is it redundant to say unexpected?) highlights were covers of “We’re In Heaven” by Bryan Adams and “All I Want For Christmas Is You” by Mariah Carey following “Love Song.” Guitarist Lee Kiernan somehow appeared at the back of the pit, eventually (and very slowly) making his way to the front of the crowd and back onstage for the closing song “Rottweiler.”
Prior to the last song, Talbot thanked the crowd for coming and creating a safe space for the band to be themselves. He lauded the use of kindness, love and empathy to take care of one another, and encouraged the crowd to create a world where everyone felt welcome. And while I haven’t been to many hardcore rock and roll concerts, I can imagine this kind of rhetoric doesn’t come up often.
That’s what I initially loved about IDLES though: on the outside their music is aggressive, loud, even somewhat unsettling at times. But inside they’re really just a bunch of softies, like me!
IDLES in concert certainly did not disappoint. There were no theatrics other than the ones the band themselves created, a testament to the way that really good music doesn’t need much outside the band to be truly good. The bold and brash way IDLES performs leaves little to the imagination in terms of how their next performance could top their last, but I have a feeling no crowd ever leaves a show feeling unsatisfied or uninspired.
See my comprehensive 2021-2022 show season playlist below.
MUNA
Jacobs Pavilion, Cleveland, OH
September 28, 2021
Much like their stardom, my love for MUNA has grown exponentially in a very short period of time. I was first introduced to MUNA upon release of their Spotify Sessions in 2019 and took a great liking to their cover of “Motivation” by Normani. I added a few songs from Saves The World to my daily rotation because I heard they’d be opening up for Phoebe, but I wasn’t really sold (however I wasn’t NOT sold).
And then we were all graced with “Silk Chiffon” and I knew I’d be hopping on the bandwagon prettyyyy, prettyyy, pretty quick. And I did, sue me.
Between “Silk Chiffon” and seeing their opening set for Phoebe in Columbus, I was very smitten. Katie Gavin was born to be a lead singer: the outfits, the frenetic energy, the way she simultaneously led the band and the crowd without fault. Naomi McPherson is a subdued yet powerful force onstage; every so often I’d be so taken with Katie’s dancing or Jo’s playing, then I’d look over to find them smiling so big, radiating absolute sunshine. And Jo (Josette Maskin, formally)! A guitar goddess for the ages. I’d say more about Jo, but then we’d never see the end of this post.
After seeing MUNA live, it makes sense that their music didn’t resonate as much with me before I saw them live: I am not sure their records do their music justice. That’s not to say that their recorded albums aren’t good, but they have so much energy on stage the songs are completely different. They started with “Number One Fan” before launching into “Stayaway,” both of which I wasn’t really a fan of until I saw them perform them live.
The recorded version of “Stayaway” is a heart wrenching portrayal of the acute awareness felt after a break up: how everything around you, no matter how mundane, can lead to thinking of a person you thought you once knew, and the gut punch that follows.
Katie’s range and stamina is so incredible that she didn’t miss a beat in the first few lines (if you listen you’ll understand why this is such a feat), and after the first chorus it’s like something erupts in all three of them and the show really begins.
“Navy Blue” was one of the tracks that stuck out to me pre-fangirling; it doesn’t seem to have a ton of significance compared to other songs on Save The World, yet it made the setlist. Sonically “Navy Blue” isn’t something that would normally catch my eye (ear?) ((see here for my playlist of unforgettable first listens)), but I love the soft jump of the guitar riff behind the words, which are quite clever also. Referencing the deepest shade of blue as a representation of the deepest sadness, in addition to the asphyxiation that happens while holding your breath waiting for someone to love you when it simply was not meant to be. So many shades of blue; Joni would be proud.
Following these first three were “Everything”, “Winterbreak”, MUNA’s self-proclaimed country song “Taken” and a very fun dance session to “Pink Light.”
And then.
I am, like, pretty chill in most instances. But when they brought out Phoebe to play “Silk Chiffon” I lost all control. It was like a month old at that point and I don’t think people had realized how good it was yet because it felt like I was the only one who was more excited about the song itself than Phoebe’s presence onstage (which like, okay fair, it was my third show at this point).
When I really enjoy a song, I hear or learn something different about it every time I listen. So I’ve thought about “Silk Chiffon” a lot, and hearing it live is one of those things that I will never, ever forget. I’ll never run out of space in my brain for songs because ones like this help to clear my head and go somewhere else for a few minutes. “Silk Chiffon” is the perfect amalgamation of sad girl pop and self acceptance that both MUNA and Phoebe have mastered, ultimately solidifying both of their roles as an irrevocable force in the alt-pop genre (and a solid place in my heart, love y’all!!).
MUNA closed their final set opening for Phoebe Bridgers on the 2021 Reunion Tour with “I Know A Place,” a sweet nod to the closing track of Punisher. Even if they weren’t aware, Phoebe fans were lucky to experience a show from MUNA. Katie, Jo and Naomi house an irreplaceable energy that works harmoniously to provide audiences (or at least me) an unforgettable show experience.
I say that because MUNA released Saves the World right before the onslaught of the pandemic, so it’s clear that they’ve been hoarding tour level energy for nearly two years. This tour finally afforded them the opportunity to release the fire and radiance that surrounds Saves the World, and release they sure did.
See my comprehensive 2021-2022 show season playlist below.
bleachers
Express Live, Columbus, OH
September 15, 2021
Better late than never!
I went with my pal Josh to see Bleachers at Express Live last week (oops it is now nearly three weeks later). While I thoroughly enjoyed Jack Antonoff’s ranting and raving about how much better Columbus is than Cleveland (If Katie Kornmiller is reading this I’d recommend Jack enter Witness Protection), seeing Josh’s reaction to a real-life rock concert was the highlight of my night.
I apologize because I can’t tell you shit about the setlist. What I do know is that the show was very good! Jack Antonoff is a savant of some sort, having worked with many notable artists including Lorde (jury’s out), Clario (big yes) and of course, the one and ONLY, Taylor Swift (re: two of the tattoos on my body). It’s obvious why his work with these women is so popular: they bring the storytelling and he turns it into “August.”
I remember being a sophomore in high school when “I Wanna Get Better” first came out. I listened to an embarrassing amount of AltNation and even though I knew Antonoff played a large part in 1989 I wasn’t sold on why I should add him into my (very limited) rotation.
Seven years later I feel the same way despite Antonoff’s participation in many projects I enjoy, so I knew very few songs in the setlist. However, Jack is quite the performer and the band was so outstanding that the songs I didn’t know I wish I had. Also I love that you can tell he’s been bottling up all his ADD level energy for the past two years and really just let it pop.
The band was very, very good. He was accompanied by not one, but TWO saxophones that were more than enough to keep my attention (I just love a brass/wind section, truly. It is why I fuck so deeply with Away From The World by Dave Matthews). I didn’t know the opening song, but I believe he followed it up with “Let’s Get Married’ which I sort of knew and was fun to dance to.
I was/am a big fan of “Chinatown Girl” so I was excited to hear that one. While I wasn’t expecting an appearance from the Boss, he was there in some facet. Antonoff’s music is very obviously rooted in Springsteen, having grown up about an hour south of Asbury Park. Similar to how I can’t exactly explain what makes Springsteen’s music sound like Springsteen, I can’t tell you why Bleachers sounds like Springsteen. Did Springsteen have a xylophone on stage? Bleachers didn’t, but I feel like this is an integral part of Springsteen rock for some reason. I plan to consult my Aunt Mary on this sometime soon, she is the definitive Springsteen expert.
I appreciated going to this show because even though I didn’t know a lot of the songs, you could tell Jack was appreciative everyone was there, and that we were able to be going to concerts again. I’ve been to a decent amount of shows where I have felt very invasive, like how dare I enter this space that is so sacred for some people. But Antonoff and his whole band created a safe space for everyone to dance and be themselves, and that’s really beautiful.
As I get older I become more aware that experiences aren’t exclusive to one set of people because of how it makes them feel. Even if someone doesn’t know all, or any of the songs, that doesn’t mean they’re any less worthy of being there (@ me). Especially when you consider how a song can be different every time you hear it. Music in general is a deeply personal experience, but Jack has a way of making the entire crowd feel catered to. Which to me is very rock and roll.
See my comprehensive 2021-2022 show season playlist below.